If you are reading this, you probably got engaged recently, so congratulations. Getting engaged is one of the most exciting times in your life, but can also be very stressful because you can’t just sit back and relax, the wedding planning must begin.
In one of my favorite movies of all time, Bride Wars, two best friends go and see the ultimate New York wedding planner named Marion St. Claire. She tells them the following on their arrival; “A wedding marks the first day of the rest of your life. You have been dead until now.” A little extreme? – Maybe, BUT your wedding is the best day and that is why your wedding planning must begin once that ring touches your finger. Most brides don’t have a clue where to begin but let me tell you, it’s not as complicated as one might think. So let me give you a few tips on starting your wedding planning and don’t take this lightly as this is “the first day of the rest of your life”.
The following steps are primarily aimed at the bride as well as a 12-month timeline for planning. If you are getting married in less than 12 months, get most of these steps out of the way a bit faster.
Step 1: Dream wedding season
You and your soon-to-be hubby must first decide which season/month you would like to get married in as this will narrow down some potential wedding dates.
In South Africa, the most popular wedding months are February – April and then October to December. If you would like to get married in these peak wedding season months then decide on about 3 potential dates as soon as possible and move on to step 2. When choosing your wedding month always keep flower growth into consideration. If your dream is to have a beautiful luxurious and variety of flowers then it is best to get married between December & March, as this is when South Africa has the best flowers in the season. If you are not so specific about the variety of flowers or specific flowers, you can rather give creative freedom to your florist and get married any other month of the year.
Step 2: Venue Hunting.
Once you have about 3 dates in mind – go and visit some wedding venues. Venues are sometimes booked a year in advance so it is very important to book your venue as soon as possible. When you have a wedding date, all the rest of your suppliers can be booked.
Step 3: Book your photographer.
Just like a wedding venue, photographers can be fully booked way in advance so make sure to book your dream photographer as soon as you have your date. I always encourage brides to spend enough of their budget on their photographer as your photos will be the only thing your left with after your big day. This also counts for your videographer if a video is on your wish list.
Step 4: Engagement Shoot
Most wedding photographers include an engagement shoot so I recommend getting glammed and getting the photoshoot out of the way. Using your engagement photos on your save-the-date or wedding invites is always special so once you have those, you can start with the invitation designs.
Step 5: Save the dates
Save the dates must be sent out at least 8 – 10 months before your wedding. If your wedding is less than 8 months away, send them out immediately after booking your date. This will then also be the step where you will find a stationary/graphic design artist to assist with all invites and wedding stationery.
Step 6: Book your Make-up Artist & Hairdresser
Most brides forget that make-up artists and hairdressers can also be booked in advance. If you want someone specific to do your hair and makeup then book them as soon as you have your date as they can’t split themselves in half, they can only do one wedding on a day. If you are not that specific about who you want to use, you can however first test the waters and visit a few salons and make-up studios for trial runs.
Step 7: Book your DJ
One thing is for sure, guests will always talk about the food and the music at your wedding so having a good DJ is of utmost importance. I recommend getting those DJ quotes in as soon as possible and making a decision. Always make sure to read DJ reviews as they do play such a big part in your wedding day. This is a vendor I would not take lightly and I would not book the cheapest in town.
Step 8: Book your officiant.
There are so many couples who forget to book an officiant to marry them so definitely tick this off at the beginning of your planning.
Step 9: Have a break
If your wedding date is more than 7 – 10 months away, I recommend taking a little break from planning and rather start dreaming about your dream dress, theme and reception. There is still a lot of time to book your other suppliers. If your wedding is less than 6 months away, then I suggest you do not take a break and move on to the next step.
Step 10: Honeymoon planning
Luckily this is usually your hubby’s responsibility but if you are planning it together, I would recommend getting quotes and booking accommodation, flights etc. at least 6 months before the wedding.
Step 11: Flower, decor, wedding cake and lighting suppliers
I finally make an appearance at step 7 as this is when you would start meeting with florists (aka ME) as well as décor suppliers. Let’s be honest, your Pinterest wedding mood board has been waiting to steal the spotlight since high school and now it can finally be shown to the world. At this step, you will start planning your whole wedding design and book your vendors for flowers, décor, wedding cake and additional lighting. The reason for this step being so far down the list is that most florists, chefs and décor suppliers can do more than one wedding on a weekend so they can make room for you in their calendar. This must however be booked at the latest, 6 months before the wedding.
Step 12: Wedding attire
When I got married, it was recommended to decide on a wedding dress at least 6 months before my wedding day. This gives the designers or dress suppliers enough time to plan your dress and tailor it according to your “hot” wedding physique. If the groom is making a custom suit, I would also start working on it at about 6 months otherwise if he will only be buying a suit at a retail store, he can start looking at about 3 months out. Bridesmaid & Groomsmen attire can also be decided on between the 2 – 3-month timeline.
Step 13: Wedding Invitations
Your formal wedding invitations should be sent out between 3 – 4 months before the wedding date. I also recommend that guests RSVP one month before your wedding so you have a month to do the final seating chart, as trust me, this is a headache for all brides.
Step 14: Appointments
It is very important that you book appointments ahead of time for your final hair trial and colour (if you will be getting those wedding highlights) as well as your spray tan, waxing, nails and all those final beauty treatments. You will want all these appointments the week of the wedding so having advanced bookings for all these treatments will just give you peace of mind. Make sure to finalize appointments 2 – 3 months ahead.
Step 15: Mock Tables & Stationary
2 months before the wedding I would recommend arranging your mock table with your florist & décor supplier so you can give the final go-ahead for all table designs. This is also when your stationary designs like programs, table seating charts, menus & welcome board ideas should be given to your graphic designer so they could start sending you different styles and choices.
Step 16: Menu
1 month before the wedding you must decide on your final menu choices. At most venues, the coordinator or planner will also schedule final meetings in the wedding month for final program arrangements so make sure you are ready with all the details like speeches and wedding timelines. After the menu and venue meeting you must also send all the final information to the graphic designer for final stationary designs and printing.
Step 17: Get your ass married!
WEDDING WEEK has arrived and now all you have to do is sit back, relax and let all your vendors do what you pay them to do.
I hope these steps gave you some advice on where to begin once you are a Fiancé. Wedding planning is not that hard and is actually a really enjoyable process. Most of us only get engaged once, so enjoy the process and be excited for your wedding day as the day itself passes by so quickly.